New Game

Read every romance title aloud and then say "by doing it" at the end. Titles that make sense with that must be good books. (Not really but its hilarious in book stores)

Book Reivew: Her Master and Commander by Karen Hawkins

I blew through this book in like four hours. Well it might have been less than that because I finished it while watching two episodes of the Borgias' and one episode of True Life. Which tells you how thrilling this book was that I managed to do that at the same time.

This is a freshman effort kind of book. Its clearly part of the first string of books published by miss Hawkins. The main female character is a widow which allows for more fooling around because she doesn't need to be chaperoned. Which frankly at that time you were a spinster by twenty two, so a widow at thirty seems to be me crazy old. Just thinking about the ages of these characters worries me some days, I mean really all these women are eighteen? But eighteen year old are stupid.

Anyway plot wise mr. man has to be turned into a gentleman in order to inherit his money. Which he ends up throwing out the window so that he can be with the girl. I got the brother's book to read some time this week so we shall see if the follow up is any good.

This is a fluffy book. There is no real plot or conflict, I don't count that bit at the end as conflict. Random bit seem to be there for the sole sake of of making the guy look wild. Meh who cares.

Book Review: Sleepless in Scottland by Karen Hawkins

I use Victorian novels to clean out my brain. It really does. This one was more or less useful. Granted the romance bit sorta popped up and disappeared from time to time. It was one of those forced to marry to save her reputation. I enjoyed it for the silly fluff that it was and ordered the rest of the books in the series, because some times some anticipation is a bit better than the muscled guy forcing his way about. Victorian novel its all about what you want and can't do which is why there is traditional appeal. These are the books that the foundation of romance was built on.

Thought of the day

Dear HBO,
Are you serious? That is all I get of Game of Thrones. Yes it get that you covered the entire first book but still. Its crazy short

Book Review: Demon Blood by Meljean Brook

This book is proof that reading books out of order is a bad idea. I am still confused what was happening in this mess of stuff. Like really confused.

Thought of the day

Life would be fun it was more like a studio Ghibli film. Granted there would be no bad guys. But we would all have planes and have no fear of heights.

Book Review: A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness

I am frankly a little angry at this book. I feel like I should give it a stern talking to and then send it to its room. I got the thing from the fiction section not the science fiction or romance section. And picking up this goliath I thought I was about to be introduced to another "Historian." A vast novel with intrugie and suspense and just a little bit of vampires. Instead I got..... Well I can't really tell you want I got.

I know I got a vampire that does yoga. Which is weird and I refuse to get over. I got a witch that can't use her magic but apparently is something along the lines of the fifth element. I got a third race of supernaturals that don't really appear to have power and more than anything seem to have some serious mental issues and a flare for art. Some how I got a mystery about an old book and a reference to the Templar's in a book that spent a good deal of time talking about love. The love story came out of left field in the sense that everyone but the heroine seemed to know it was coming from page one. I got a whole lot of quotes from book I haven't read and things in french.

And at the end of all of this with a book big enough to eat my math text book the story is not over. Yes we needed to uncover the mystery in the past and there simply wasn't time for that. Its not like we could have cut out the pages about horse back riding. Those were completely needed to show stuff and what not.

I get wanting to go in depth but there needs to be balance between depth and pacing. Mysteries that move slowly don't really keep people interested. Ignoring "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" because while I understand that it is popular I about swerved off the high way I was so bored when I listened to it. Every couple of pages the characters talked about how some one was going to come after them. When? Next Christmas? Are we going to get a post card noting their renewed pursuit. Then randomly big bursts of action and right back to nothing but tea.

Can you poision yourself with tea? Or coffee? Dragon Tattoo was nothing but coffee this is nothing but tea. Have a soda for god-sake people.

The thing is, beneath all this mush there is a kind of cool story. It does have some really stupid moments but I really want to know what is in that Alchemy book, which is what I was promised by the book flap. I want to know about the missing pages and what not, but after 592 pages nothing has even been theorized outside a few passing comments. This is what they put on the cover and yet nearly the whole bloody thing is about Mathew and Diana not being allowed to be together because they are a difference species. Every now and then its about how Diana is the fifth element but can't do anything with her magical space powers.

The book ends with the love birds going back in time to finds Diana some witches to teach her to use her powers and maybe while they are at it find the old book. But that seems to be the second thing on their mind. The entire second half of the book barely mentions the book.

There are good moment, good ideas hidden in this mass. I still am not sure if they make it all worth it.

In Other News

So I know the media is big on the Weiner guy right now. But I want to say that the fact my last name sounds out to "Gee I'm Naughty" when kids say it amuses me more than all the penis shots in the world.

Legend of the Guardians

So this movie had me at the digital owls. I mean I was so on board for digital owls.

And then I saw the movie. This is not one of those kids movies where they put stuff in for the adults. This is the kind that bore me to death and frankly anyone else over five. The pictures are pretty but the writing and every thing else about this movie is very surface level.