Friday, March 9, 2012

The Shoe is on the Other Foot

Today one of my friends sent me back the first draft of my novel with some notes. I find it hysterical because she tears into the slop I wrote the same way I do everything. The following are just in the first couple of pages and they make me happy.

Lakes have rooms? Do you mean an underwater cave?

It’s a little frustrating that Autumn understands but isn’t letting me in on the secret. If it’s not explained more clearly soon, it might be a problem.

Okay, I’m going to say it not because I care but because you WILL be made fun of for it: SUMMER’S A GIRL NAME! (I was aware of that but I like naming my boy character a girl name. Deals with it)

Does everyone pay her in curry? That seems... unlikely

This makes me sad. Make it better.

Vikings didn’t die out, they just settled down and became Scandinavians [except for the few who became French].

More description please. Make less brain-hurty. Also ouch. I was not prepared for drawing-and-quartering.

Why? What did she do to confirm her innocence? I didn’t realize making a joke was sufficient evidence to prove you’re not a murderer. (There was supposed to be a sentence there that never made it into the draft due to me getting distracted.)

"Yes?" I am a word smith. (Are you now?) {I don't think she got my sarcasim here. Still made me laugh so hard.}

Anyway the point of this whole thing is I am having a blast reading these. I really am. Most of what she is pointing out are issues I already knew existed but hadn't fixed for the purpose of getting things down on paper before making the details perfect. I am not sure if other people would find some of this stuff annoying but I think its epic fun. I can see her sitting there reading my book making faces every time I messed something up because most of this was written in 30 days. I am glad that she seemed to have loved it seeing as she got it back to me exactly a week after I gave it to her. 

So yeah. I can take what I dish out. Just putting it out there. 

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Book Review: Lothaire by Kresley Cole

At first I was like "no." And then I was like "okay maybe." And now I am like "but there were so many things that could have been cooler!"

This is what I call the bad guy pitfall book. It happens eventually in a series like this, where every character eventually gets a true love. For some reason authors get it in there head that this character they have setting himself against all the other main characters needs a true love as well.

The issue here is I think Cole knew she was going to give Lothaire a girl from day one because the guy never really seems that evil. I mean yes he does do some mean stuff but never anything crazy evil. True he is a bit crazy but really what character in this series isn't? I mean he has yet to kill anyone we care about or hurt children or helpless women really. He just kind of threatens the main characters a bit in every book and then kills some one off screen. But the good guys kill plenty of people so I don't really see the difference.

Also. Mother Fucking Stockholm Syndrom!

In similar news why do all of these immortal creatures act like teenagers? I mean honestly I am going to be twenty four soon and even I don't have this much emotional retardation going on.

It was good but not great and I feel like it is just going to blend into the background of this series. The characters did nothing of interest the entire book and the ending just sort of came out of no where.

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Book Review: Dearly, Departed by Lia Habel

Okay so I hate zombies. I mean they give me the every loving creeps. I have nightmares about them when  I don't even talk about them. If you talk about zombies around me I have a nightmare. I long ago accepted that I am an epic pansy and my great Achilles heel is zombies.

So, several people are going to crucify me when I say I liked this book. I mean it lead me on in the wrong direction with the book flap but I think I just didn't read things correctly. I was expecting Steam punk Victorian romance, and what I got was post apocalyptic steam punk victorian. Yeah I know. My brain also was really confused by that idea as well. But Habel did get it right, if religious conservatives were the only ones to survive the apocalypse then we would end up with Victorian era part two.

I enjoyed the main characters of this book rather a lot. Granted there were a lot of them because every chapter moved around to a different point of view. And for some reason it took me till about chapter fifteen to realize that the character's name was with the chapter number and told you who was talking.  I liked the zombies the best really but almost all of the characters that were teens made me laugh at some point.

My favorite part perhaps is when Nora has locked her self in a room and Bram the zombie heart throb trying to get her to come out. I don't know if you know anything about a folk singer Jonathan Coultan but he has a rather funny song called Re: Your Brains that this scene simply invoked.

Besides that the one thing that did rub me the wrong was what I like to call "stockholm syndrom love." This happens in a good deal of books where for some reason the girl is being held against her will for a decent part of the book. And this book totally did that. Granted eventual Nora starts helping Z Base but still I am always annoyed when this is a thing.

Is the only way to fall in love in a short period of time involve being held against your will? I really want to know because I swear I could find an instance where that happened and it did not involve lying about the situations at hand.

The only other thing that me a bit crazy was the end. I mean I was under the impression that they found a vaccine. But then oh noes, some of the zombies did infect people that had the vaccines so bad things are going to happen? Like they hadn't already. I was really confused by that part.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Book Review: Entwined by Elisabeth Naughton

I read the first book in this series a while back. And by a while back I mean last year or maybe more. I had gotten the first book as a free download and I remember not hating it completely so I got the second one from the library when I was trying to think of something decent to request.

I had kind of forgotten that this series was all about Greeky mythology and that the male leads are all part of a super group of warriors who can each trace their roots back to a one of the ancient heroes of legend. Although I still don't remember why the bad lady was in hell or why she got thrown out of the special magic world. I mean I vaguely have and idea but most of that is just mush in the back of my brain trying to make sense of it.

I will say that I don't hate Callia and Zander. I think they have some kind of chemistry. But I do think that it is really weird that they could basically work in the same building for ten years and never once confront one another about what they thought happened. I just think it is odd that the major plot point is that her dad lied to both of them and they sort of just went with it. Also when her dad died I was not sorry to see him go, he clearly was a complete ass for what he did to his daughter.

The thing that gets me is the King and his one "real" daughter Isadora. First of mr. man can't seem to keep it in his pants. I mean the entire first book was basically them like "you are human!" and then the girl being like "but also my dad is your king." So he already had one daughter out of wedlock. So when there were hints that Callia's son was a prince I just sort of groaned and accepted the fact that of course she was also the kings daughter.

Isadora is really were my rage settles in. I didn't hate her so much in the first book. She was trying to help her sister and get out of an arranged marriage. She proved she had some back bone in that book. In this book she just kind of becomes Bitch tastick. When her dad is like "arranged marriage number two!" she just kind of sit back and takes it. She gets annoyed but doesn't really do anything and just seems to throw a tantrum by cutting her hair.

The super bitch moment is when Callia realizes that her son did not die during labor and is still alive. Callia is dying to go find her son and save him from the demon her father sold him to, and Isadora seems to think it is the perfect time to get all high and mighty suddenly. She says in so many words that Max will never be king because Callia is a bastard child. And oh by the way she still plans marrying Zander even through its super clear him and Callia have been in love all this time.

And no one says anything. No one is like "princess, not the time." Great personal revelations have just occurred and the main characters have finally learned the truth about what happened to their child, and now is the time she chooses to go all upity. Then she still after everything is super ready to marry Zander after all of that. Well not super ready she lets her handmaiden drug her so she can get out of it.

I want to punch this bitch. I get that we are supposed to feel sorry for her because daddy always made her choices but she is just a mean person. The shitter is the next book is about her, and I hate her. But I really like the guy she gets to bone, which is completely depressing.

Anyway. These are worth the read if you like Greek Mythology and romance novels. That might be a smaller niche than I think it is.