Friday, December 31, 2010

Why We Need Parental Controls For Our Parents

My mother should never be allowed on the internet ever. And frankly no mom that I know should be. A few dads need to be monitored as well. I don't know if any of them are capable of traversing the internet without infecting their computers and ending up at stupid websites that are not helpful.

True once upon a time AOL was reliable internet and browser provider. Now it is a joke. It is the home of the pop up cookie. They list nothing but silly stories. It has never been the good at performing searches and frankly needs to be put down. We as a younger generation need to rise up and demand the permanent disbandment of AOL and force all users to download Google Chrome and use gmail.

My mom has some how managed to flip her name on Facebook. It now reads her Last First name. I can't figure out how she managed to do that. I tried to do it myself just to see and I can't seem to manage it. She doesn't even know how she did it. I could try to explain it to her but I am pretty sure that would take days over the internet and hours over the phone. But seeing as she hardly ever changes her password I am pretty sure I can make a few guesses and get in and fix it for her. And while I am at it I want to take away her ability to send people applications on Facebook because that is getting out of hand.

Further more she some how finds all these E-cards that I am pretty sure are laden with viruses. They are creepy and ask for me to join their services. When I went home to see her I could barely see any internet page because every halfassed company had a search bar insert, she had seven at least.

My boyfriend's mom sits on AOL for hours and then prints of the articles like they are to be trusted and hands them to us. Frankly I don't know how she gets to her email everyday seeing as the one time I clicked it by accident about eight windows popped up. And then she says that Google is confusing.

These reasons are why I think we need to create an internet aptitude and computer test for adults. The test would include, turning on a computer, opening and internet browser, searching for a few websites and images without ending up on a scam or miss-clicking to something crazy, sending and email that does not include ALL CAPS as a way of showing something is important, sending an attachment in an email that is not a virus or impossible to open, navigating away from a program, not downloading anything and everything, running a simple computer scan.

Anyone unable to pass this test would have parental controls placed on their computer so they cannot harm the machine and anyone else who might need use of it.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Book Review: Double Enchantment by Kathryne Kennedy

Two things I love: Magic and Bodice Rippers. Combine them into one and you pretty much have one of my addictions. I sorta hunt for these kinds of books. Recently its been easier to find them because people seem to have finally caught on to the genius that is my addiction. But really hard to find is books that take place in Victorian England plus magic and shape-shifters. Which is why I just added Kathryne Kennedy to my favorite authors self on my Nook. I mean business people.

In Double Enchantment Jasmina Karlyle makes an illusion of herself so she can return some jewlery her mother stole. Problem is the illusion become real and wanders to a party and then leaves with a man, sleeps with him and marries him. Then things get interesting. The plot is well paced and I am fond of the gnomes that make and appearance.

I was a little bored with the love line of the store, but at this point I have read so many romance novels that its rare an author throws me a curve ball. Its pretty standard. They hate each other, or are crazy mad about each other but something is preventing them. Sometimes both. Stuff happens. They realize their feelings a damn the consequences. Normally the man is a complete ass of some kind at least half of the book. (which is why I super loved Play of Passion because the guy was different. I need to reread that. its happening.)

The mystery in these books are pretty cool. (Did I mention this was part of a series? I didn't? Bad Alyse.) In the series there are these magical jewels call Merlin's Relics and they are extremely powerful, they are also the only magic that can fool or hurt a shape-shifter. In each book the characters along with the Prince are searching for the Relic because they always seem to fall into the wrong hands. They all seem to do different thing and are rather interesting. I have downloaded the next book and have every intention of reading it soon.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

MTV is Stupid

There is this British show called Skins. I watched it on Netflix a while back and it is pretty fantastic. Its pretty much a bunch of drunk British kids who sorta have no idea what they are doing and how to fix the problems that arise. Tony is the mastermind of the operation and is the cause and solution of many of the cast's issues. I watched the first and second season in about a week. I didn't watch the third season because the main characters switch to Tony's younger sister who in the first half never said a word.

A few days ago I saw an add on MTV for their "new" show Skins. At first I was laughing because they named an old show new. Then I saw an extended preview during "I used to be fat" tonight. They remade the show. Same damn characters, apparently the same plot lines, hell half of the shots in the show are frame for frame the same. The difference is that now the characters are not British and they have American accents. Two characters have flip flopped races, and Sid is now Stanley.
New sucky version


But I have fury!

The original was great. It was strange and all the slang was cool. A good deal of the show made more sense because they were British and half the shit wont work with Americans. I am not pleased.

Not to mention I get the feeling the plot line where the Middle Eastern kid and his best friend have issues, because the best friend is gay and insists that he tells his family that his best friend is gay. The the kid's dad talks over him when he tries to tell him he is gay, saying that he is his son's best friend and if they don't tell is wife he doesn't care. That's not going to fly on this side of pond. Hell half of it wont fly. So much rage!

I've been bad

I haven't really been working on here or my novel that sits half finished and completely outlined on my computer. Mostly I blame my new job. I never know when I am going to be working and when I do I am so tired afterward that I can't come up with anything creative.

It is crazy hard to think of anything interesting or original when you have spent the entire day asking customers how they like their bath to feel. I did get some material for a semi argument scene from one lady but that's really it. I outlined a few scenes in better detail right before Christmas and thought I was going to be awesome and work on it. But that didn't happen.

Now I am sitting glaring at my computer. I am glaring because I have no drive to write creatively and soon I will find out the fate of my job. On friday they are going to tell those of us who were hired for the season who is staying on. But frankly I am sorta hoping I don't get picked. I need a real person job, or at least a real person internship where I do real people work and get paid real people money. Not to mention have time to jot a thing or two down during my lunch hour.

Anyway. Britt was saying she just started something where she is going to post every day for a year on her blog. So I am going to try and do that as well. She started on Christmas. I am going to start today to be annoying, because why would I start on a set holiday or a date that is at all memorable?


yay!

Monday, December 27, 2010

Be Prepared

Because I have been working a lot lately I haven't had a ton of time to read. But I have had time to stalk the Barnes and Noble website for the free books they give me all the time. The thing is they don't really give me high quality books.

Back when I was first looking at getting a digital reader I remember seeing the fact that Barnes and Noble was going to include free weekly books as part of their Nook program. That plus a few other perks that Kindle didn't have swayed me to the Nook team. It was by the third free book that I realized they were giving me the ones that make me roll my eyes. Oh well. More material for you!

On another topic according to the blogger tracker apparently half of my viewership is from websites that are not in English. I am very interested in seeing how this works out.

I am going to go track down some really horrible books to read, laters!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Dear Holiday Shoppers

I don't work on commission, I am not trying to get you to buy more stuff so I can make money. But it is my store's policy to help you in every way possible. If I don't ask question about who you are shopping for and what they like then I will be pulled aside by my manager and asked why I am not asking enough questions.

And frankly this close to Christmas we both know "I'm just looking" is complete BS. Either you have some one on your list that you think might fit my store or you don't. I am glad you think It smells nice and you want to see what all the colors are about but if you realize you are not going to buy anything don't come in when we are jam packet and act as if its weird for me to ask what you would like you to help you find.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Bad Disney Channel is Bad

Dear Disney channel, what the hell is this? What is this! Answer me! Did you take another favorite Meg Cabot book and mess it up! Because I think you did. I've got my eye on you.

I was on my netflix because boyfriend had vetoed me when I wanted to watch more Dexter. I was clicking through new movies to watch so I clicked on a movie called Avalon High, which is mean a book by Meg Cabot that I liked a few years back. The book is based on this weird idea that King Arthur is going to be reincarnated and so are all the other people that were important to him. The book was epic because the main character is Ellie who turns out to be the reincarnation of the lady in the water. She befriends the new Arthur who goes by Will in this life. So much of it was perfect and funny and well written.

And then I watched this. First of all Ellie is now Ally, which I can take but it differs in the fact that the point was that the Merlin guy got confused because the woman Lancelot was married to was named Elanor which is her full name. Then the actress was short and blond when Ellie is supposed to be tall and a brunet. I get picky about details. Then all the actors look about ten and have the ability to deliver their lines as such. I was groaning off and on as the movie continued.

Then they up and f***ed the ending. Will is not King Arthur, Ally is. The teacher that taught her everything in the book is Mordred. The evil brother is good and loves Will. Merlin is a new character. And they just referenced that they Ally should have been the lady of the lake. Make it stop mommy! Make them stop ruining my favorite things. Did I mentioned that in the final battle they are in really cheapish looking armor? I didn't oh it was was. Geek kid just said the stupidest chant to get a magical staff. Oh goodness.

I would like to make the point that by changing who Arthur is messes up the whole Modred plan! It doesn't work! Did they change this just for the girl power aspect? Did they mess this up because Disney is really trying to stop showing women in a submissive position? Because in the books Ellie totally takes out Marco with a body slam and does most of the work and then because she is the lady of the lake the sword she gives Will is magical because she gives it to him. This is a massive disappointment.

"Wait if you are the reincarnation of King Arthur what does that make me?" -Will "My B***!" - Me. (yes I talk to the movies that make me crazy. stop looking at me like that.)

Also by making it a girl it ruins the whole point of there being a Jen, Lance and Will love triangle. It ruins it!  I am going to murder this credit song!!!!!

*storms of in a rage of fan girl hate

Book Review: Dark Secret by Christine Feehan

This is one of those authors I see all the time. I mean I see her books every single time I go the book store. I have always semi considered reading the books for a while but mostly I had other authors to be more interested in. Then I moved and was left with a library that had little to no romance novel selection.

I literally sat down and pulled out books one by one until I could find something where the back of the book didn't revolt me. I grabbed this one because I was like "sure, three hours time to give up." So this book there vampires, that aren't really vampires and they hunt the ones that are really vampires. But they lose emotions over time and get closer and closer to turning into vampires. The trick was it didn't but the word vampire on the back so I was tricked. That's been happening recently.

Anyway we have a woman who is really determined to take care of her family and her ranch. I like her, rather a bit actually a few times there she seems like she is going to punch the guy out and I want her to. The guy is stupid and one sided and I hates him. The entire book he does stuff against the girls will, and she sorta gets pissed but he get horny and she sorta puts up with it. She is pissed the whole book and then right before the end when he almost dies she suddenly loves him, and its not that she was upset that he almost technically raped her she was just afraid to love him.

There is something about mind control and evil vampires and turning against the will of the woman. There is some pretty cool sex scenes, which would almost redeem it but the story is rather retarded.

*bangs head against table.

What was I talking about? Wait was I doing a book review? Oh this lady? She has a lot of books out, right? So how is this so bad? Dear God why does this keep happening! I used to love this other author back when she started writing but by the 10th book I dropped the series for the sole fact that they sucked, and that every book made less and less sense. And yet they are popular and what not. argh.

Books like this are why I named the blog as such. Because I finish reading things like this book and I say that aloud, and then my boyfriend rolls over and tells me that I need to stop staying up to read a book I thought was stupid a third of the way in. He is right of course but I keep reading.

On top of all of that the book cover freaks me out. That model is creepy, look at it for about a minute and you will be fully scared of him.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Quote of the day

"Give some one the freedom of a myspace page and the worst you get is some stupid wallpapers and music. Give them only a gamer tag and what do you get.... alternating caps. People should not have these freedoms."
-Sean "Day 9" Plott, during a Starcraft replay mentioning how stupid gamer tags can get.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Library Books Smell Funny

I think this one smells like peanut butter, or something. But there  is a very strong nutty scent to this book and it is messing with me. I miss being able to buy books and have that fresh press smell. Library books are always a strange smelling bunch.

Book Review: Fool Moon by Jim Butcher

I picked up the next book in the Harry Dresden Files novels from the library. I think I am starting to enjoy the series all thought I still have issues with the portrayal of women in said books. Anyway lets dive right into this book.

The book starts off with Harry being really low on money because recently he hasn't had any jobs with the police department. The last book left a back stink on the relationship between Harry and Murphy the detective he normally works with. He has an argument with one of the women who locally is a practitioner of magic. She is asking about a a kind of magic that is beyond her and Harry says no he wont help her. After that Harry gets called by Murphy to come look at a crime scene. Very quickly we find out that the crime was commited by some kind of werewolf.

This is the part in the book where I went "Yay! Werewolves!" Anyone that knows me know that I have a preference for werewolves because they are the more epic of monsters out there. In this book there are several kinds of werewolves. First there is a kind that is a Human that simply learned how to change into a wolf. They are still a human but now they have a wolf like form they can take one. Second is a human that makes a deal with a demon to get a magical belt that turns them into a wolf, draw back is in this one the belt is evil and makes the person slowly turn into a demon. There is another kind where its the animal spirit in a human body and they never transform. Then there is the final version where the person is cursed to turn into a wolf-like-demon on every full moon. And we get to play with them all in this book.

I am not going to ruin the plot but lets just say shit gets crazy. Once again I would like to point out that I seriously doubt if Harry can run from a monster when 24 hours earlier he had the shit beaten out of him. I am just trying to be realistic about this. Also why are there so many women that are that hot hanging out around him, of does harry just have really low standards. I we got Susan who seems to love Harry for some reason. Murphy who can't figure out if she wants to shoot him or not. Then in this book there is Tera who may or may not be a wolf that figured out how to become a human and spends a lot of it being half naked and graceful. I dont know. Then the female FBI lady is all predatory. I am seriously starting to worry about Jim Butcher and his relationship history.

I vote read it.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Book Review: Ravished by a Highlander by Paula Quinn

Um, what was I doing? Oh yeah I was going to review this book, why was that? Because I picked it at the library and I need to review something. Not to mention that I don't have anything else really at the moment unless I pull out an older book so this will have to do.


I picked this book up because it had a shirtless guy wearing a kilt on the front. What can I say I am easily drawn by shinny things and shirtless men. I couldn't really read the description because the library put the tag over the back story. I was low on reading material so I surrendered.


I tend to like books that have kilts on the front because then its some kind of He-man taking a fiery woman away to his castle. Which makes me happy in the small cave-woman part of my brain. This one started off bad because it started in a convent. Nothing interesting in a romance novel could ever start in a convent. Because that means we are getting a super religious woman with faith and forgiveness and all that mojo. Romance novels are supposed to be passion and excitement not this really slow burn of love. Well at least that is my understanding, its not called a bodice ripper because things are tame.


The main plot here is that the woman is the secret first born of the brand new King of England. It was one of the James guys, and its right during that time when being Protestant or Catholic was a big deal for the royal family. There is a mention of the puritans having left so I think its about that new world time. The girl is secret because James is being forced to raise his children as Protestants but he is Catholic so he sends his first daughter away so that he can have a Catholic heir. And then we bring in the kilts and frankly there are about a thousand of them in the book that I can't even tell who is who beyond the main character.
I mean seriously after the third time they explained that the different guys were cousins I about smacked my head into the table.

There was nothing particularly great about this book. I never felt the chemistry or the passion between the two characters. At the end I was sorta like, um so I guess this is love sorta. Anyway this book was stupid, its ideas are stupid and I am bored.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Slow on the reading

The last couple of weeks have been crazy at work so I have no time to read right now. I will try to get a review up about Fool Moon by Jim Butcher in the next couple of days. But Monday is most likely when that will be happening.

Quote of the day

"The more I think about the line 'I want to be the friction in your jeans,' the more I think I am going to have an aneurysm. It is either extremely clever or extremely stupid."- Boyfriend talking about Fallout Boy lyrics.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Quote of the day

"When they brought up that first giant squid I think all my hopes and dreams were crushed. It easily fit in that boat. A giant squid should have been two hundred feet long, not twenty." - Boyfriend

Some time later.

"We need to genetically create a Krakin to make up for the epic failure that is the giant squid." -Boyfriend

Bad movie, epic monster.

Adventures in Cleveland

A few months ago I moved to Cleveland to live with my boyfriend. Having been dating him for three years I was well aware that snow was common in this area. I have been trapped in his house on many a visit by the snow. At the time I was rather thrilled to have snow to play in, and snow angels to make.

This is my house on an average December day
In Indiana snow comes and it goes. There is enough that you need to get the shovel out and go for your driveway, but a little bit of salt covers all the roads and keeps them safe. We have only had a few white Christmas's in recent years. I would say that normally we get one good blizzard, that is only about a third of a foot.

Two days ago I got to experience my first white out. Which was a little bit like having a panic attack while being trapped in a moving box surrounded by a sheet, no that is exactly what it was like. I was not driving at the time but I was freaking out totally. The worst part of it was that the snow appeared to be centered around this house. I checked and I now literally live in the area that receives the most snow out of all of Cleveland. There is a giant white cloud that hovers over us and poops endless amounts of snow on top of us. I am not kidding, google it. Chesterland Ohio has a snow vortex. It gets worse because they use well water around here there is no I repeat no use of salt on the roads. Factor that into your head. Tonight I saw at least eight people using snowmobiles as a legitimate mode of transportation and not something to do that was fun.

This is my boyfriend's house on an average December day. Ten points if you spot the driveway.










































































I have been watching the weather and its pretty much going to be snowing on and off for the rest of the week.  I had to break out the car with snow tires the other day because it was coming down that hard while i was driving. But I was starting to get used to the level of snow we had. I have to wear boots all the time, but I like my boots so there is nothing really wrong with that. This morning my boyfriend asked if I would come downtown with him so we could go out to dinner. At the time the snow as around the house but not anywhere else in the city. This is pretty common that we get about six miles away from the house and it is suddenly clear.

That was not the case today. According to the local news the city hasn't been hit this bad in a decade. About twenty minutes into the drive the traffic began to slow. We weren't worried it was an hour and a half before class was even going to start. It took us about twenty minutes or so to get passed a car that had spun out and hit the wall. There was some snow so we realized that all the cars were slowing down.

And then about half a mile from the exit all traffic stopped. The snow came down in total white out. We sat for two hours within normal viewing distance of where we needed to be. It was all kinds of fun. Not to mention the boyfriend missed his class and only walked in right before the teacher told everyone to leave. The local news people didn't make it to the station on time. Several of the basketball players showed up late to the NBA game tonight because they were stuck in traffic. Professors said they were just going to spend the night downtown rather than risk it. Cleveland State campus was officially closed but they couldn't leave because the parking lot was gridlocked. The student center was packed with kids unable to leave.

This is a new level of horror involved with snow, the likes of which I had never seen before. As the song so clearly states, "There's nothing wrong with Ohio, except the snow and the rain." That pretty much sums it up.

I end today with a selection of photos that the local news put up of what Cleveland looked like.
This is what I looked at the entire time.

I was at this street. It looked like this for about two hours. I think I saw this car...


Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Stuck in My Head

My boyfriend really loves Starcraft. I have learned to enjoy the game to a point, and I find that there is a large following of very funny people that make really funny stuff.

There is this one commentator that talks about all the games in Korea. He is the most famous commentator in Korea. His name is Nick Plott and he goes by Tastless, which is his id tag. And then some one went and made a song about him. And it is crazy catchy.




It will never get out of your head. Your welcome.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Some Reviews

I can't really muster the energy or enthusiasm to put too much effort into these two reviews. I got two books from the library because I didn't have any money to buy new books. Frankly I have seen these books for a while now and have up until this point avoided them out of a gut feeling. Then I tried to give them a shot figuring that Mercy Thompson is my favorite series and it isn't really a romance novel so I can try to give these a chance. I don't think I should have bothered.

The first book is Witchling by Yasmine Galenorn. The story follows three half fae sister who are sent to earth to work as part of a new task-force created to deal with fae and human relations. They are also supposed to protect portals to the land of the fae. the eldest sister is a witch, the middle a shape-shifter and the youngest is a vampire.  The first book is told from the point of view of the eldest sister, and she makes me a bit nuts. She only wears dresses and skirts, some of which I think the author doesn't know would look silly on anyone. She also always wears heels.

On top of that she has some kind of magical vagina because every man in the book is crazy about her. Oh yeah and some demons get lose and are trying to end the world or something. That's supposed to be the main part. It is, but frankly this book was a cock block. All this talk about sex and then the shortest descriptions I have read in ages, this book shouldn't be classified as romance.

I really think we need to iron out what does and does not constitute a romance novel. And I want to be the first to say I really don't think Nora Roberts counts. I would also like to say that if you are going to some how have the libraries put that little heart sticker on the spine there better be enough in that book to make my blood race, not a vague male description plus an vaguer sex description.

The second book is told from the point of view of the middle sister who seems more really that miss fetish. But then she goes and wears turtle necks half of the book. I want authors to know that no one under the age of 45 wears a turtle neck, and those women normally have given up on the their sex life. Young pretty women don't wear turtle necks unless they live in the arctic. Also I was really rooting for her to get with the werepanther because I am all about Were-animals. But apparently the human that didn't even really like her in the first book is way better. I really hate when the more relatable character doesn't get men. Its stupid.

I will most likely end up reading the next few books. But I have very little drive to finish it. So yeah. Read if any of this sounds good, or don't if you think you might get bored like me.

Also I just saw a photo of the author and suddenly get why the busty sister gets all the guys and the two thin ones can't find any. Lets just say that these books might have a lot to do with what she wishes would happen.

Quote of the day

"Don't you own all the Harry Potter movies? Why are you watching them on ABC Family?"

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

What Happened to Critics?

I am sitting here watching some show on MTV, now that I check its 16 and pregnant or as I call it watch white trash struggle with common sense, when a commercial for the new Assassin's Creed game comes on. I may not be very good a video games but my boyfriend and my brother play them constantly, and I learned a long time ago that if I wanted a relationship with my brother I was going to have to figure out video games. I can figure out the mechanics of how most games work and the basic story line, I can all be a good guess of how good a game is at this point.

I watched the boys play the first game, which was pretty good but has a lot of glitches and things that got annoying. The second game didn't really change or fix much, and the third is about the same from what I can tell. SO WHY THE F*** DO THESE COMMERCIALS GIVE IT A FIVE OUT OF FIVE? I see this shit all the time, games that are only good get the best reviews and shit games get good reviews.

Its not just video games, its movies and books and everything. There are a few critics still out there that say bad things about stuff, but only a few. I swear everything is the best game, or the best movie. It will blow you away! The best thing on bread!
He is going to stab you with the awful.

this really started back when that one guy got fired from some gaming magazine for saying a game was bad, because that game had sponsored the magazine for over a month. We are losing the critical eye because critics are afraid to say anything bad about something that might have put an add in their medium. So now everything is great, and really it just sucks more.

A WTF Moment

I was flipping channels a little while ago, I have the day off work and am spending the time vegging and catching up on emails and such. There I am changing channels when I come across a show that seriously freaks me out. What is this monstrosity that could possibly freak me out because i love all things trashy and drama driven?

Bridal Plasty.

The name alone worried me, then I watched the show. In this show soon to be brides are competing for the opportunity to receive the plastic surgery of their choice. That much alone made me want to gag. Then came the episode itself. First the women walked into a room where there are giant pictures of them in their bathing suites and wearing no make up, I realize that I came in towards the middle of the show but whatever. They flash over several of the photos and I would have to say that for most of the women I don't see a need for plastic surgery, a good physical trainer could fix about half of them. Two or three of the girls look great to me and I see no reason for them to need any kind of tweaking. The host then tells them that there is a puzzle they must solve that reveals what they might look like if they receive all the surgeries they want. The first few to complete the puzzle will win the chance to attend an injectables party.

The girls that lost one of them must be kicked off, when the one woman loses she is told that her wedding will go on it just might not be perfect. I about threw the remote at the screen then. This show is truly everything that is evil. I mean I like Jersylicious and all its cat fights, but this is simply playing up insecurities that have no business on these women.

This is just gross. Boo this.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Book Review: The Taming of the Wolf by Lydia Dare

So there was no new episode of House this week, which means that I had a lot less to do, which also means that I am going to write a book review. (Brittney I am putting this here to see if you read this. If you do send me a facebook message with the words peanut butter.)

I gave in and bought a book the other day. I was rather upset with myself mostly because I can't seem to figure out if this book was worth the purchase. I started reading Lydia Dare's series about werewolves in Victorian England over the summer. My boyfriend calls them the books that "has bite" because that was the only quote on the first book's cover. The first book wasn't crazy exciting, but I enjoyed the introduction of the wolves. The second book had a bit more romance happening and the plot was more entertaining. The thrid seemed to bore me to death, the characters just made things hard for themselves the entire time.

This book the main character were two people I had not enjoyed in the previous installments, so I wasn't sure. I still can't deiced if I like the leading female, and the guy has some serious self loathing issues that I think are so common in Victorian romance I almost gagged.

If you like werewolves I would suggest taking a look at the series just for that sake, but the characters spend little to no time as a werewolf that its almost moot point.

Friday, November 26, 2010

Black Friday

I get to work today. Pray for me, or come to Lush in Beachwood and buy stuff.

They are here and they want soap!

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving in interesting. Its a holiday based on a disastrous encounter with another race. We celebrate it by dealing with awful travel conditions and then sleeping on lumpy air mattresses. If you are me you get to top off the experience with your mother vomiting for no reason other than being nervous and refusing to come to dinner.

But there is something to be said for family. Every year my aunt will attempt to say some god awful long prayer themed speech at the beginning. Every year my dad would ask for the cliff notes, and now with the changing of the guard I have the honor to harass her. Every one taunts Jessica and my brother about their relationship statuses. There is never enough rolls to make everyone happy. Jessica and I make fun new alcoholic drinks when there is down time. The small dogs always pee on the floor at some point. My aunt insists that my uncle should never retire, he agrees. We argue about how stupid the Real Housewives series is vs other like minded reality shows. We debate and yell about which movie to see after dinner, my grandma and I beg for the more interesting movie while everyone else wants to see the big blockbuster. Grandpa always tries out a new joke and then resorts to something he knows by heart.

I like that I get these things every year, lets me know that even with one parent gone and the other one checked out the rest of the family is still there to make us nuts in their stead. So this year I am going to do something fun. I am going to pull out an old family video to show that even before most of the kids were born or could walk the dynamics were the same. Also everyone had on some crazy ass clothes, but still.

Quote of the day

"On a scale of 1 to you knew it was coming, how predictable was what I just said?" - Lauren

"I had a dream about this last night!" - Me

Because some friends never let you down when it comes to what they pick out clothing and jewelry wise. Its nice to know some things never change.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Quote of the day

"I'm not crying, you have simply reached a new level of awful I was previously unaware of."
-My boyfriend to a fellow gamer.

Book Review: Strom Front by Jim Butcher

So my boyfriend is crazy about this one video game podcast. When I say crazy I mean super crazy. He has told me that if Day 9 tells him to dump me he will. The guy is really funny to say so myself. I dont really get half of what he is saying but he gets on tagents that have nothing to do video games and that makes my day most of the time.  See Video:

 

So when Day 9 said that he really loved the Dresden Files books and that everyone should check them out my boy friend told me to pick him up a copy of the first book at the library.


I had heard of the series before, even read a couple short stories that had been published in an anthology. I had also watched the sci-fi television show on netflix out of boredom about two months ago. I knew pretty much what I was getting into.

The books follow a man named Harry Dresden, who is the only openly practicing wizard in Chicago. He functions has a police consultant and a private investigator. The stories play out in a very film nior kind of way. Harry sucks when it comes to women and yet in each book there is a new woman for him to drool over, not to mention the nice police lady that is a constant character. He drive a very old VW Bug and has a bad reputation with breaking any and all technology he comes in contact with.

I am just going to say this, I looked at the back cover, Mr. Butcher is not what one would call overly masculine. Yet his hero is supposed to be this epicly tall man with great looks who doesn't know anything about women and yet gets them in bed all the time. The books in that respect play out like a wet dream he wrote out for himself and every other magic geek that ever dreamed of something similar.

On the other hand the stories are good. I like the way the mystery worked out and I enjoy the sense of humor that is given to each scene. I do feel that one too many chapters ended with a line that was always roughly: Who says I never have fun/do something interesting/get out on Friday. I did feel just a bit like Harry was way too hurt and sleep deprived to have functioned normally by the time the book was over. Why is it that heroes never get to take a decent nap? What do all these authors have against naps?

I like the book. I really do. The magic and demons and what not are pretty much where I like them to be. I just had a lot of time to nit pick because the first book has also been turned into a graphic novel/comic book, whatever. I picked up the first half of the comic first because it was what they had at the library. So I spend the first half of the book comparing the two, and frankly I enjoyed the comic a
lot more, not sure why. Then again the book was funnier. I am torn.

Final Verdict: On the fence really. I didn't love it, I didn't hate it. I think the way the women are portrayed as strong but still constantly as sex objects might be what is getting to me. I recommend it but be prepared for a lot of talk about long legs, and I mean a lot.

Also for those interested here is a link to Day 9's website, for further information about him and Starcraft.http://day9fan.com/

Thursday, November 18, 2010

One More Thing...

Harry Potter is tonight. I am not really going to say much just that I have a sinking feeling about my mood when the movie ends. Also I have to get up ungodly early to do inventory at work, which only make things worse.

Book Review: Firelight by Sophie Jordan

Sigh, do I have to review this book? Oh fine. So yeah I picked this one up because it was being hyped as a good one at the book stores. I should have ignored it. I don't know why I am so easily swayed by cool looking covers.

I finished this book in a few hours. I wasn't even really concerned about the main character by the time it was over. This book rings greatly of Twilight. Granted the main character has a bit more depth, but only a bit. She basically hates that her mother moved her, resents the fact that her mother and sister want to suppress her dragon nature and find dealing with normal humans hard to understand. I liked her a bit more than I did stupid f***ing Bella, because I too did not enjoy moving, had issues with my mother trying to assimilate me and feel annoyed by most people. So that was okay.... I guess.

But to counter balance that there was that love at first sight bull crap. I hate that more than life. (I don't really hate life if you are reading this Lauren, I just like the expression.) I want to punch every author that does that. I might make it my life goal.

I am not even going to discuss the plot in detail because as far as I can tell there isn't one. (Just like the first Twilight.) The entire book was establishing the main character and how shitty she has things. Then a boy comes in for a bit and he is hot and they sorta try to resist it, which only serves to anger me. Then there is a fight at the last eight pages of the book and then it ends. I shit you not.

The real reason I groan and moan about this book is because it ends in a way that tells you there are more coming. Also because when I googled it there was this video from a new broadcast that said "Is Firelight the new Twilight?" To which I have to say: Not While I'm Breathing! No seriously if this shit happens again I am going to go Super Saiyan on their asses.

Final Verdict: Don't Read, Don't Buy, Punch anyone you see reading it. I mean it. I will allow for hooks rather than a straight face punch but they better do damage.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Quote of the day

"Mongolian beef. I think I'm in love."

"His heart's occupied elsewhere," said Ben from behind me. "And even if it weren't he's not interested in your kind. But, I'm available and ready."

"You don't have a heart," I told him. "Just a gaping hole where it should have been."

"All the more reason for you to give me yours."

I pounded by forehead against Warren's back. "Tell me Ben's not flirting with me."

"Hey," said Ben sounding hurt. "I was talking cannibalism, not romance."


Blood Bound by Patricia Briggs

Sunday, November 14, 2010

A Problem With Height

So Romance Novels there is this idea that heroes need to be tall. I get that, a lot of women respond to taller men. We respond to the protector idea that this taller man gives us. But there is a point when it stops making sense. I am not kidding. I picked up a book not too long ago and several of the characters were supposed to be around 6' 8."

This is my friend David, he is 6' 8" and frankly is not that scary looking. The simple fact is that when some one gets that tall its hard for them to build a lot of muscle. So instead they are rather lanky. I don't care that the authors says these giant men work out all the time they are still going to be very lanky and frankly just plain tall. Anything above 6' 5" pushes the human body in the lanky direction.

I know that fantasy romance authors want to make the men appear to be out of this world so they exaggerate the heights but seriously it makes no sense!

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Why I Rock

I finished not one but two books today. Oh yeah. I did that. Not to mention I slept in and went for a walk and gave myself a deep conditioning hair treatment. But still two books. One day.

A Silly Photo to Make You Smile

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Book Review: Leviathan by Scott Westerfeld

Before I start this review I need to explain what steam punk is, because steam punk is an important factor in why this book is cool. Steam punk is a very specific kind of science fiction writing. The basic idea is that we assume the steam technology that allowed for trains and other devices to be created came much earlier in the time line than it did in real life. This assumption results in there being airplanes long before there really were airplanes. Depending on when the technology boost happened steam punk can be a extremely varied genre.

Scott Westerfeld is a master at making his science fiction seem real. He is most know for his notable series called Pretties. It takes place in the future and he created the entire world in such complete detail that he released a book simply to explain the science and language of this made up future. Which puts him in a classes with Tolkien.

Leviathan is the tale of World War I in an alternate reality. In this alternate reality the Allies depend on genetically altered animals while the Axis use high class machinery. The story explains that not only did Charles Darwin figure out evolution, he discovered DNA and how to manipulate it. This means that fabricated animals exist with specific purposes. In the mean time giant war ships, and for those of us who watch anime, gundam like machines patrol Germany and Austra- Hungry.

The book begins on the eve of the assassination of the Arch Duke (the same arch duke who's real assassination began the real war). In this reality he as one son Prince Aleksandar who with the help of his fencing teacher is smuggled out of palace at night, because in this reality the Arch Duke found a way to make his son legitimate (something that was not true in our world).

We also meet Deryn Sharp, a young girl posing as a boy in order to work on an airship. Her father was one of the founding fathers of the flight exploration and she longs to ride a "Helium Breather." Deryn through an interested chain of events ends up on Leviathan, the flag ship air beast in English aviation. Alek makes his way to the same ship but giving away how would ruin all the fun.

Westerfeld knows what he is doing when it comes to writing science fiction in the teen category. This book takes a twist because he has pages illustrated just like they would have been around the time of World War I. The book ends a little soon for my taste but seeing as the sequel is already out I am anticipating a trilogy.

Steam punk is not something everyone can like, but this book doesn't really shove it down your throat. Also Westerfeld hold close to nearly all the original historical events with only minor adjustments to the time line of the beginning of WWI. He even explains the differences at the end of the book. The illustrations help bring some of the more fantastical creatures to light and make them real. Sure there is alot of stuff that might go over people's head the first read through but the story is so very much about learning the world, and knowing the characters that it shouldn't be too scary.

Final Verdict: Buy it. Well buy it if you like science fiction or steam punk. The maps that are part of the hard cover edition are awesome. Also Westerfeld makes you work for it when it comes to details in sequels so you will need to go back and look things up.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Book Review: Jekel Loves Hyde by Beth Fantaskey

Um so I am still not sure what just happened. I opened this book at about three today. I finished it about forty minutes ago. I am serious. I mean I know I read quickly but that's strange. I have pulled books off in a sitting but never without staying up all night and being really jittery. This one just flew right by me. Some of that might have to do with the chapter length. Seriously more than once the "chapter" was one page. I was laughing the third time is happened.

The book is decent. Its an interesting take on the tale of Dr. Jykel and Mr. Hyde in which the book is based on fact except Mr. Hyde was a separate person. So each male in his family ends up carrying the beast inside of them. While Dr. Jykel's family goes on to try and find a cure while also attempting to hide the formula. The two main characters are cute and play off each other sorta well. But I have read it all before. The cute shy science nerd with the slutty best friend has the mysterious guy fall in love with her. I mean this is pretty much the same characters from the book Hush Hush I read last year. I swear to god when the best friend was suddenly trying to hurt the main girl to make her jealous I just skipped the page because I have read it all before.

The issues is the climax, or rather the lack there of. I have been cock blocked when it comes to sex scenes in the past but never before has the really epic climax been taken from my grasp. Right when the boy is about to face his father in a battle to the death the chapter ends and skips to the mother fucking epilogue. I kid you not. There is simply no climax. I get that the author was trying to avoid a graphic scene but after having spend a rather long time hinting at and then out right talking about sex I assume a certain age range for the readers. I think if they can handle the possibility of sex they can handle a semi graphic fight scene, thousand of other young adult authors have accomplished it. This was just a complete cop out.

Final Verdict: Unless you really like twists on old stories don't even pick it up. The book flap gives just about everything away.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Thought of the day

My most recent review got me thinking about something that happens in romance novels of all kinds way too often. All of us that read romance novels have seen it, and we all curse it. I am talking about the character that completely changes as the book goes on in plot.

It starts off like this. We have a hard core man or woman. They are the scary person that is seen as steely and unmovable. They are the ones that ever one knows to be this hard core kind of person. And then the plot begins and a love interest comes forward and suddenly they are this kind-hearted person that has a deep kind of pain and they spend all their time masking it from their friends and family. Its stupid and it makes me want to scream.

Am I supposed to believe that the friends don't know about this crap? Because my good friends read me like a book. I mean seriously, sometimes they know how I am feeling before I do. But all these romance authors expect us to believe that the Duke who has been cruel to all his business partners is also the man who takes in street urchins and has a fondness for kittens? You can't paint a picture of a ruthless sort of person and make them a giant softy. It goes against basic personality constructs. Yes you can be cunning and kind, but that's not really something that happens that often in real life.

A few authors are really bad at this, and I mean horrible. Look if you want to have a "bad ass" make them a fucking bad ass, don't them a puppy with a big bark. On the flip side don't make some one who is really funny the cut throat assassin in secret, its ridiculous and we don't buy it.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Book Review: Play of Passion by Nalini Singh

So I did it. I finished Play of Passion in time to write this, sadly not in time to make it on the author's web blog. But I can dream. So lets get into the review.

This is Nalini Singh's next installment in her Changeling Psy series. I would be lying if I didn't say that this is perhaps one of my favorite series of all times. This book held true to her standards. Play of Passion follows Andrew and Indigo of the SnowDancer wolf changeling pack. Both characters have been introduced rather extensively in Caressed by Ice and Branded by Fire. The fact that they had been introduced before put Singh in a tough spot.

Drew is an established character. Both of his sibilings have had their own book so readers are aware that he is a prankster and a bit of a tease. Indigo is second in the pack rank to Riley (see my review of Branded by Fire.) so readers know that she is strong woman. I will admit I was worried. I know of authors that have established a character as one kind of person and the second they get their own book they turn out to be some one completely different. I almost was covering my eyes hoping this book would turn out well, and thank god it did. I need to learn to not doubt Singh, she has yet to let me down.

Drew and Indigo have a good vibe and the book works well. Drew remains the silly guy that he was in the previous books and uses that humor to charm and woo his woman. Indigo doesn't turn into a harpie or some kind of hellion but stays the icy person she has always been, but she of course warms to Drew's charm. The political intrigue takes a little be longer to get a move on than in other books, but I  got the feeling that this book was a set up for next book which promises to have more suspense. Indigo does take just a little bit longer to warm up to things than I might have really liked, and there was some vagueness about just how dominate Drew was. The climax also happened rather quickly. I blinked and the all the build up had come to an end. I wont say what happened but a few others might agree that it was rushed.

All in all it was a really good read. Right now I don't feel like it is one of my top favorites of the series, but I suspect that by the second time I read it Play of Passion will join Branded by Fire and Caressed by Ice as one of my favorites. What can I say? I have a soft spot for the wolves and am excited that it looks as if I will be getting more of them. Don't get me wrong I enjoyed the DarkRiver based stories alot, but I have to say that I am biased towards wolves because they are one of my favorite animals.

Play of Passion marks a switch for the series with the rest of the wolf lieutenants being revealed. The next book is supposed to be the story of the SnowDancer alpha and I am so excited I might scream when it comes out.

Final judgement: Buy it. If you like paranormal romances this  is a series you should be reading and this book is one of the better ones. Although I would suggest reading previous books because the political intrigue has been building from the beginning.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

E-books Rock

So Play of Passion by Nalini Singh just came out today and thanks to the magic of e-books I got to download it pretty much the minute it became Tuesday. This is why I love my Nook.

Goal is to finish it by tomorrow and get a review up for everyone.

I'm off to read!

Quote of the day

"All the bad ideas in history involve cross dressing."

-Kill Me, Kiss Me

Sunday, October 31, 2010

Vampires, Sluts, and I can't feel my toes

Halloween is upon us once again. I have every intention of sitting at the front door guarded the candy just to make sure there aren't any left overs, and so I can get all the good chocolate first. There are not alot of kids on this street so there should be too much trouble in general but I am waiting to see what kind of costumes make an appearance.

Thursday I went out to a bar for Halloween. It wasnt very busy so I was able to get a good look at all the costumes. I know I am not the first to say this but why must all female costumes be a slutty form of what the original was? Secondly who the devil wears that little clothing when its raining and close to forty degrees out? I mean maybe I am just not build to withstand the cold the way people from around the Cleveland area are but the second I saw the temperature I put pants on rather than the shorts that originally went with my costume.

I have memories of living in Chicago and going in early on Halloween because it was so cold, and back in the day I was wearing long underwear under my witch costume. I am just not good at this whole idea that I need to be nearly naked when its so windy outside. I will admit that last year I wore less than I should have on Halloween but I ended up stealing the coat from the guy dressed up as Brad Pitt from Inglorious Bastards, and I think I took some one else's scarf.

The real kicker this year is that no one and I mean no one is going as anything interesting. Last year I had a buddy go as American Psycho and the previously mentioned Inglorious Bastard attire. I also saw a lot of really cool ones while out at a party, but this year things are lack luster. The number of Alice in Wonderland themed costumes went up because of the Time Burton movie. If you feel like wearing a body suite you can dress up like one of Na'vi from Avatar (I saw a lady in that costume, it was not pretty. to pull it off you need to be pencil skinny she was not.) I had also been expecting to see a lot more vampires. I mean really a whole hell of vampire were supposed to be out this year. So many vampire related things happened this year and yet I only saw one Edward, to say the least I am disappointment.

The only costume that made me smile wasn't eve on a person. At Hot Topic they had a black corset with a bright green skirt and GIR head band that gave you his ears in dog from. I am still a little surprised I didn't pick that one up. I had gotten lazy and just bought the shirt from the bar in True Blood and sorta dresses like a waitress. The Gir costume would have been better but I would have basically been in underwear.

Next year I plan to have a costume figured out a month before hand and possibly make my boyfriend go along with it. I will also need to make sure we have super awesome plans because everything sorta fell through this year.

I am going to go see if I can get to candy before anyone notices.....

Quote of the day

The Letter M: What's wrong with you? All you talk about is aliens and ghosts and seeing Bigfoot in your garage!

Dib: He was using the belt sander...

 Invader Zim

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Quote of the day

"Sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel is not the promised land, its just New Jersey."

-John Stewart, The Rally to Restore Sanity

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Book Review: Insatiable by Meg Cabot

So over the last couple of weeks I have been posting my book reviews on Wednesday. Mostly this has to do with my general lack of other things to do on Wednesday night. So from now on I am going to try and post a book review every Wednesday.

This week I am reviewing Insatiable by Meg Cabot. The book is Cabot's attempt at doing a "sequel" (according to her website) to Dracula. I am not really sure that is what the book ends up as. The story follows Meena Harper, a young woman who works as a dialogue writer for a popular soap opera. Meena also has the psychic ability to tell when and how people she meets are going to die and spend a good deal of time trying to warn off friends and family from possible doom.

Then there is Lucien, Dracula's son and charming vampire who is captivated by Meena and wants to run away with her. There is also Alaric Wolf who is a member of the Palatine Gaurd who is sworn to kill vampires and follows Meena to get to Lucien.

I still cant figure out if this book was sarcastic of serious. One scene she is clearly making fun of Twilight that its pretty much a case of copy right infringement. But then the first half of the book Meena spends the entire time talking about how stupid this obsession with vampires is and how stupid they are as a species. All of that I was on board for but then things switched up a bit. Suddenly I wanted to stab Meena for being exactly the kind of stupid woman she had made fun of earlier.


Spoiler Warning: If you are interested in reading this book stop now. If not this is a big part of the review.


The one thing that made the second half of the book tolerable at all is that Meena tells Lucien no. At the end of the book when he wants to sweep her away from everything she knows and loves and turn her into a vampire she says no to him and leaves. I liked that part a whole lot. As some one who has dropped everything to live with her man I can say that just dealing with that one person will make you crazy. Any real person would go nuts. So I respect Cabot for having Meena know that she needs to be a full person to be happy and that is not going to happen if she lets Lucien "take care of her." But everything before that was stupid.

Cabot is one of those writers you have to really love to enjoy this book at all. She isnt particularly original but her books are always funny. On the other hand she has two types of heroines that she writes, one is a kick ass take no shit kind of girl, and the other is wimpy and self doubting and loathing. Meena was mostly the second.

I got the book on tape and that might have been one of the big draw backs for me. I tend to skim pages about descriptions or when the female lead gets mushy (its the only way i was able to read Twilight without burning the damn thing) so the fact that i had to hear every word made me a bit crazy. I really didnt need to hear about Lucien's sad eyes as many times as I did.

Alaric Wolf was the only character I really liked because he was always who he was supposed to be. Lucien and Meena flip and flop as to who their character act but Alaric is pretty much hard headed and I love him for it.

Final rating: Don't read it, its not worth the time. Unless you are a die hard Cabot fan and want to see this for giggles. I would suggest picking up her Mediator series, its way better story telling and the characters are more believable.

Nook Color

What do you mean there is a Nook Color? AHHH!
I see what you did there Barnes and Noble you released this just before the big new software update that is going to make everything more amazing. You crafty devils.

I will have to think about how a feel about this because I am not pleased to say the least.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Thought of the day

Why does this exist? Not how I get how it would exist, but I want to know why. Who was the person that thought this needed to be created. And why is it not a picture book? That's the level of maturity of fans we are talking about. I just need to think about the fact that this is out in the world, along with Twilight books, which makes me think they just publish anything these days.

Monday, October 25, 2010

Writers Block and Halloween Blues


I am stuck once again when it comes to writing. I am sitting here at Barnes and Noble most likely annoying the cafe lady because I only bought one thing, and I can write. This is half because I am distracted with playing with my blog. But I feel bad because just days ago I wrote 5 pages in one sitting.

I am beginning to wonder if the only time I have strokes of creativity is when I am trapped in a car for 5 hours. But the major issue appears to be music. I have trouble writing if I don't have the right music for the scene, and the next couple of scenes don't really have that much of a feel to them. They are basic build up and kind of dull if I am being perfectly honest. Frankly Pandora can only do so much when it comes to assisting me in my music dilemma.

I need to get back to my outline and check that I have this right.


On a related note there is a new Gena Showalter book coming out tomorrow and I am pretty sure that the next Nanili Singh is not long off.  I am stoked about both. But just a bit more about Singh because she is giving the entire book to two wolves. And I have been waiting for this book for a while. The last two books were all Psy and humans  and frankly I didn't care as much about them. Which is good because I have just been re-reading old stuff. Also considering watching Lord of the Rings all over again. But I am not sure if i will be able to sit still.





Pandora keeps getting annoyed because I am skipping songs I don't like.


Not to mention I am having trouble figuring out what I am going to do for Halloween. Originally I was just going to purchase one of those normal slutty versions of something from the costume store. But then Chris was going to dress up as the medic from Team Fortress 2 and I was going to go as the Scout.
Medic


Then I wanted to try and get a few friends to dress up as the survivors from Left 4 Dead.
Clearly I would be the only girl.


Chris also suggested I dress up as Kerrigan from Starcraft, which would be super cool even if I did have to dye my hair red.


But as of right now, only a few days off, we have nothing planned. Which is really starting to worry me.